Real Talk 5th January 2024 by Aoife CodyKane

‘I Am Enough’ – The Art Of The Affirmation

Repeat after us!

 

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If there’s one thing almost every woman on this Earth knows the feeling of; it’s having low self esteem.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where many women feel like they’re under constant scrutiny from social media, and a suffocating pressure from the patriarchy – not to mention the battle against your internalised mean girl voice that’s hell bent on hurting your feelings.

But you know what? It doesn’t have to be so hard.

If you’re constantly feeling like everything would be better if you had that ‘glow up’, fighting feelings of low self worth, or simply want to brighten your life with a little self love, it’s time to make a change.

Of course, the journey to self love isn’t a quick fix. It will often involve lots of different things – you might start start working on your relationships, seeing a therapist, pursuing hobbies, journalling, or whatever looks like growth to you.

And while these are all great options once you’re ready for them, they can feel a little daunting when you’re just starting out, and they’re often time consuming too.

 

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This is why we’re focussing on a brilliant beginner tool for self love – the use of positive affirmations!

Affirmations are something that you can start right away, with minimal effort (ish, but more on that later) and great rewards.

They’re a brilliant, gentle stepping stone on the road to a happier, more secure, and radiant version of yourself.

Let’s look at the art of the affirmation; why it works and how to make it part of your routine.

What are affirmations?

Affirmations are statements you say out loud to yourself and in your head, that focus on promoting positivity, self love, and challenging negative beliefs or self doubts.

Examples are:

• I am enough

• I am perfect exactly as I am right now

• I am loved

• I am deserving of good things

• I am confident/happy/beautiful/successful etc.

• I have everything I need to be happy

• My feelings are valid

How do they work?

The idea is that you if you repeat specific statements to yourself, you may be able to help condition your brain into thinking more positively toward yourself and about your situation.

Language is powerful; studies show that when we repeatedly speak about something in a negative way, it affects how we feel about that thing – and that can even change our chemistry.

In Susan Sontag’s book Illness as Metaphor, she describes how studies suggest patients who are told they have cancer may get sicker more quickly than patients who are just told they have a serious illness. Susan suggests this is because of the associations with the word “cancer”.

If negative words have the ability to make you more sick, it makes sense that they could make you feel bad about yourself too.

So, if throughout your day your inner talk is very negative to yourself, you might start forming beliefs that align with the words you use. Maybe you make a mistake at work and think, “I’m so useless at my job,” or you get into a fight with your partner and think, “I’m so difficult to be with”.

Over time, these negative affirmations can spiral into ideas about ourselves that are hard to shake; “I’m a useless person,” “I’m a difficult person,” “I’m not worthy of love”.

By practicing positive affirmations every day, you’ll start to cancel out feelings of low self worth and re-train your brain to be more confident and secure.

 

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Let’s say you use the affirmation, “I’m doing my best and that’s enough.”

Over time, when you find yourself thinking, “I’m terrible at this”, your brain will cut in with “hang on a sec – no you’re not. You’re doing your best and that’s enough!”

Eventually, your self beliefs will start to shift, and you’ll find yourself feeling lighter, happier, more compassionate and confident in yourself, and ready for growth.

How can you implement them? 

It all sounds great, right? So, how do you get started?

The first thing to do is think a little about what core beliefs you might be trying to challenge.

If you’re struggling with low self esteem, is it related to your body image? Or an idea about how you’re perceived?

Perhaps your issue is with confidence – you don’t put yourself out there in your career, or you find it hard to be assertive in relationships.

 

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Maybe it’s none of these things; maybe you just want a little boost to help you through a new phase in life, or to realise your best self. It’s all about choosing affirmations that will work for you.

Write your affirmations down somewhere so you don’t forget them. It’s a good idea to start small, maybe with just three or four affirmations that you’ll commit to repeating.

The next thing you want to do is find the right time to say your affirmations, and get into the habit of saying them once a day.

Maybe you look in the mirror before brushing your teeth each morning and say them to yourself then, or maybe before bed you write them in a notebook and read them out loud.

Some of you might find this tough – like we said before, self love can be hard! It’s okay if you find it emotional to begin with, or feel completely cringey complimenting yourself out loud.

 

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The thing is, those feelings of resistance are exactly why it’s important to push through – because why should you ever feel bad about feeling good about yourself?

You deserve to be happy, confident, fulfilled, and to shower yourself in self love.

After all, you only get one version of yourself in this life, and that version is absolutely perfect just the way it is.

Repeat after us – “I am enough!”

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